BY CYNAID CREE
We all have been taken advantaged of at some point in our lives.Sometimes we let it go but when can you risk putting yourself in a bad relationship, only to realize later on in marriage that your partner takes you for granted.There are many sweet people that helped pick up the broken pieces of a relationship,perhaps formed a relationship with someone after they had been dumped,ended up pregnant or something similar along the line and helped put some grace back into shame .Although there is nothing wrong with helping someone to recovery,but you sure dont want to be just somebodys rebound guy or girl.Your needs also need to be met.
Sweet people have to learn to be more assertive to how they want to be treated because people only treat you how you want them to treat you.If you walk into a restaurant and they keep serving you stale or cold food and you never complain or talk to the manger about your dissapointments,the restaurant will always be serving you stale or cold food.Nobody is saying you have to cause a scene and cause all the people to run out but you do need to address your concerns as you are paying for the meal.Someone who is too nice and too sweet will be thinking I dont want to upset them or hurt their feelings because I come here all the time.
There is some men and women that have taken advantaged of their partners and the victims become more like housekeepers or financers or babysitters instead of a partner.They soon end up in a loveless marriage while they partners are busy cheating out of the home.These incidents happen often because some sweet partners are too allowing,to considerate and too helpful and choose to do everything thats asked instead of stressing their dissapointment and anger.By Stressing your feelings in the beginning of your relationship you show your assertiveness and then nobody can take advantage of you.It takes two people to work in a relationship and marriage and no one person should be doing all the work.
So if you are a passive person and feeling taken advantage of:
1)Learn to slowly stress your concerns of a relationship
2)Learn to be frank or upfront but in a non confrontational/angry way
3)Try to start a new relationship instead of picking up the pieces of somebody elses.For passive people this can be highly stressfull and takes alot of energy to maintain.Passive people are quite rational people and hardly find themselves in trouble.Chances are if you pick up the pieces of another relationship,your partner could find themselves in another situation for you to keep bailing them out.
4)Respect yourself so that others can gain your respect before you comitt to anything
5)Dont be too trusting in everything you hear
6)Take your time to understand people and situations before to start helping anybody.
7)Look for re-occuring patterns of others to not get suckered into their stories.
We all have been taken advantaged of at some point in our lives.Sometimes we let it go but when can you risk putting yourself in a bad relationship, only to realize later on in marriage that your partner takes you for granted.There are many sweet people that helped pick up the broken pieces of a relationship,perhaps formed a relationship with someone after they had been dumped,ended up pregnant or something similar along the line and helped put some grace back into shame .Although there is nothing wrong with helping someone to recovery,but you sure dont want to be just somebodys rebound guy or girl.Your needs also need to be met.
Sweet people have to learn to be more assertive to how they want to be treated because people only treat you how you want them to treat you.If you walk into a restaurant and they keep serving you stale or cold food and you never complain or talk to the manger about your dissapointments,the restaurant will always be serving you stale or cold food.Nobody is saying you have to cause a scene and cause all the people to run out but you do need to address your concerns as you are paying for the meal.Someone who is too nice and too sweet will be thinking I dont want to upset them or hurt their feelings because I come here all the time.
There is some men and women that have taken advantaged of their partners and the victims become more like housekeepers or financers or babysitters instead of a partner.They soon end up in a loveless marriage while they partners are busy cheating out of the home.These incidents happen often because some sweet partners are too allowing,to considerate and too helpful and choose to do everything thats asked instead of stressing their dissapointment and anger.By Stressing your feelings in the beginning of your relationship you show your assertiveness and then nobody can take advantage of you.It takes two people to work in a relationship and marriage and no one person should be doing all the work.
So if you are a passive person and feeling taken advantage of:
1)Learn to slowly stress your concerns of a relationship
2)Learn to be frank or upfront but in a non confrontational/angry way
3)Try to start a new relationship instead of picking up the pieces of somebody elses.For passive people this can be highly stressfull and takes alot of energy to maintain.Passive people are quite rational people and hardly find themselves in trouble.Chances are if you pick up the pieces of another relationship,your partner could find themselves in another situation for you to keep bailing them out.
4)Respect yourself so that others can gain your respect before you comitt to anything
5)Dont be too trusting in everything you hear
6)Take your time to understand people and situations before to start helping anybody.
7)Look for re-occuring patterns of others to not get suckered into their stories.
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