WHO IS CHANCE?

BY CYNAID CREE
Is there really such a thing as chance or do we just have the appearance of chance and everything is orchestrated to get us to the point of where we were meant to be?Did you ever lose your keys only to get so late that you were late for work but also missed a huge accident?.Did you get stuck in traffic only to realize that if it were not for the traffic you would have been killed in a terrorist attack?When I think about the September 911 incident I think about all the detours that were put in place so that the people who were meant to survive were delayed that day in various ways for some reason.

Last night I watched a movie on tv ''THE ADJUSTMENT BUREAU'' starring Matt Damon and Emily Blunt.Totally magnificent movie,which is put in the SCI-FI THRILLER category.The Bureau is a group of people,I 'd like to think they are from another portal,maybe intelligent aliens that we cant really understand in this point in time, who adjusts events so that mistakes or accidents happen to alter the destinations or so called life paths of this 2 individuals.However they are willing to sacrifice all the plans that was pre-set for them just so that they can be together.Ok I just spoiled the ending for you but it s a great movie to get you thinking WHO IS CHANCE?Is chance God,Is chance our guardian angels,is chance just  coincidences,but how does a scene in our lives repeat itself so that at some time we are at the exact time in the exact place no matter where in the world we are to meet an important person so that it could complete the ''meeting".What we do with that meeting is entirely up to us but you cant help but wonder how hard ''CHANCE'' was working to clear the path so that a particular event could happen


Remember the movie BACK TO THE FUTURE when Michael J fox had to go back to the past to reset the events to help get his parents to meet.Several times it almost didnt happen.It makes you wonder how hard CHANCE tries so that if it does not happen the first time for some odd reason,the timing is re-orchestrated again so that 2 individuals can meet again of which we are unaware of.Michael J fox saw himself disappearing on the photograph and knew he had to get his parents together.It was a fighting task.So the next time you're complaining in traffic just calm down and think that maybe'' CHANCE'' is busy working their magic for someone else.

The great thing I've learned is that when we are willing to risk everything,fame,money just to live life and share it with someone else that we think has changed us for the better then life is so much more valued and worth living.If you listen to the stories of old people,its the only advice you'll need.When you get to that age,when you've been there,done that,seen and experienced life then the material way of life is a waste of time.Old people will tell you but you dont need to be old to realize it,you can start living right now and appreciating everything that comes your way:)I always say hugs and kisses are free,take it.

WOULD YOU JEOPARDISE A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP FOR A BRIEF FLING?

BY CYNAID CREE
Many couples came forward telling the the stories of how they had a brief fling only that it was too late to fix the relationship due to the trust factor that keeps re-surfacing.
Women tell that the only reason they take back a cheating husband is because of the children and they even opt for counseling,but once they try to mend the relationship,the trust factor at the back of your head is always there and so eventually the relationship does break apart because you live with a person you dont know anymore.

Men tell that they have flings only because of the sex and maybe they just get bored in their intimacy within the marriage because its not there anymore.It does not mean they dont love their wives.The wives dont agree and think that if you love someone you cant be that stupid to risk everything just for a brief moment of pleasure.Women also say that they too know when the intimacy decreases in their relationship.They would also want to have that in a relationship but when you start a family the responsibilties changes within a home.Its not that you dont want to make time for intimacy but cooking,cleaning and the kids can sometimes take away all your time and theres little time left for intimacy.Eric Anderson authour of THE MONOGAMY GAP:MEN LOVE AND THE REALITY OF CHEATING interviewed 120 men and discovered those who cheated did so because they were sexually bored and unsatisfied with having sex with one person.

If men who cheat,then their other reason was that they were not bored with the person but just bored in not having sexual variety.
Although men who end their affairs always get caught because the other woman always wants more and threatens his job,threatens to come clean with his wife or the wife eventually suspects her husbands strange behaviours.Most men are not open with the communication with their wives and think if they ask for more sexual intimacy,that this could upset their wives.Then theres the wives that dont take the gesture seriously and so the men stray.This should not be an excuse for straying though as I do believe women would also like more intimacy. If men can help with the kids,the cleaning or the cooking this can leave more time for couples to spend together and solving the problem of flings.Some Men do have the habit of coming home and expecting a spotless home,dinner on the table and kids already put to bed and still expect all the intimacy with that.Its nearly impossible to do all of it with a family of young kids.I do realize its an important factor in a happy marriage and women should realize it in their marriage and learn to ask for help and learn to request date nights during the week so that you dont lose the spark in your own relationship.

The thing about flings whether its a man or woman when someone has been unfaithful how can you not live in fear of them hurting you again.If someone has a thought of a fling in their mind they should think twice before they gamble away a good relationship that took years to build only to throw it away on one fling.Whereas a relationship that you invested love and time in,it only takes communication to help you realize what was missing or how you can add something again that you once had before.

photo courtesy:Simon Howden